Saturday, January 1, 2011


As is the custom in our society, I've been asked several times if I have made any resolutions for the New Year. Actually, I have not. No, I'm not perfect--far from it--and yes there are things I would like to improve on in my life. So why no resolutions?

I have found that intentions are so much more powerful than resolutions. Sure, it sounds like semantics; I assure you it is not. Let's take a look.

Resolutions come from a place of recognizing that there is something about me that I do not like, and I should change. Resolutions do not come from a place of acceptance of what is, but rather from a place of making a judgement of what should be. It is me making a judgement, creating conflict inside of myself.

On the other hand, intentions are born out of a desire to do something because I want to do it. Intentions are congruous with who I am on the inside and what I value and therefore do not create conflict. Value shifts almost always precede manifestation.

For example, I valued a healthy lifestyle long before it manifested in my life. It was something kept trying to change with shoulds. I should exercise. I should lose weight. Finally, I released the shoulds and just said, "You know, I intend to run. I want to run. Being a runner is on my 'bucket list.' Why not start now?" And I did.

I didn't set any should barriers for myself. I just went for a run. I liked how it made me feel and I did it again. And again. And I said, "I wonder how far I can run today? I wonder if I can go a little further?" And I did. "I intend to run today," became my self-talk. Not, "I should run today." I'd never get anywhere with that sort of self-talk.

And you know, when you intend to do something today, and you don't make it happen, there's no judgement. But, if you should do something, and don't, man the judgement is harsh. And it's like getting behind on studying. Eventually, you try to cram (which doesn't work) or just give up.

Do you see the difference?

What do you intend to do this year?

I intend to run a half-marathon. And if I don't, no problem.

I probably will.

Be kind to yourself!




  1. "The unexamined life is not worth living"

  2. Wow! Thank you.You have articulated an instinct I've felt about resolutions for many years...they didn't "set right", but I couldn't understand why. Cool.

  3. Marc, I really understand where you are coming from and each New Years Day I make some intentions, 9 times out of ten by the end of that year I have accomplished those intentions...because they are not shoulds....never realized that until I read your blog...thanks, and happy new year and new intentions... Diane

  4. A beautiful post that makes total sense! Thank you Marc, for this inspiring post. - I'm definitely going to start saying "I intend to," instead of "I should..." more often! :)
    Sending blessings of love & light your way,